Biting

Family

Behaviors & Emotions Infants & Toddlers

Ouch! Biting Hurts

Biting by infants, toddlers, and two-year olds is a typical behavior. As children gain language, self-control, and problem-solving skills, they usually outgrow it. Yet, biting is often upsetting to families; understanding why your child is biting and how to support them is the first step in responding appropriately.

Why do young children bite?

Young children bite for many reasons and the reasons vary from bite to bite. Reasons may include, but are not limited to:

Relieve teething pain
Explore cause and effect
Experience the biting sensation
Satisfy oral-motor stimulation
Develop self-control and problem solving skills
Lack of verbal language skills
Communicate or express needs or difficult feelings and emotions
Feel strong and in control
Imitate other children and adults
Act in self-defense
Get attention

Connect with a SpecialistToddler Behaviors and Emotions

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Understanding and Responding to Children Who Bite

Parenting expert Lauren George shares why biting is a common part of early development and how to support your toddler's social-emotional development.

Biting

How do I prevent biting?

Biting is a typical part of development. Oftentimes infants and toddlers lack the skills needed to express themselves in other, more appropriate ways. Preventing biting is all about building the social-emotional skills your child has not yet developed (and should be excited to have!) while also providing love, compassion, and consistency in their daily lives.

Understand your child's development

Have age-appropriate expectations for your child’s behavior based on their current skills and abilities. Unsure what to expect? Read more about developmental milestones.

Be consistent

Keep your child’s schedule, routines, and transitions predictable and consistent, especially at meal and bedtime.

Provide multi-sensory play experiences

Offer activities and materials that allow your child to relax and release tension (e.g. yoga, deep breathing, playdough, foam balls, bubbles, soft music). Provide items to mouth or bite, such as teething rings or access to their pacifier. This helps children learn what they can bite safely, without hurting anyone else. For many toddlers, delaying transitioning off a pacifier until after the “biting stage” decreases biting behaviors.

Talk about biting

Read books together about biting, like “No Biting” by Karen Katz and “Teeth Are Not for Biting” by Elizabeth Verdick. Watch shows, like Daniel Tiger, and sing songs that support alternative behaviors.

Support language development

Model language with your child, giving them the words they need in the moment. For example, you could tell your child “Say: ‘I want a banana’” or “Tell him: ‘I don’t like that.'” Additionally, support the development of emotional language by using and encouraging emotion specific language to help your child develop self-control.

Offer gentle guidance

Being a toddler is hard! Offer gentle reminders, phrased in a way that tells them what behaviors you expect. Validate their feelings and emotions–responding with love, reassurance, and acceptance. Use emotional language, like “I understand you are mad that you cannot have a cookie.” and “I see that you do not want to be buckled. You are upset. Being buckled keeps you safe.”

Featured Resource

Strategies for Supporting Biting

Use this resource as a tool both at home and in child care to prevent biting behaviors and understand infant-toddler emotional development.

Strategies to Avoid

Many toddlers and young children bite. Developmentally, most toddlers don’t have enough words to express how they are feeling. When responding to your child, keep in mind that they are lacking a skill in the moment and do not have the ability to problem solve in other ways. The below strategies are counterproductive and should not be used when your child bites.

Don’t bite back

Biting a child back to show what it feels like creates confusion and fear. Young children often cannot make the connection between why you bit them and their own biting.

Don't punish

Punishment does not help children learn discipline and self-control. Instead, it makes children angry, upset, defiant, and embarrassed.

Don't give too much attention

Avoid giving too much attention to a child after a biting incident. While this is usually negative attention, it can still reinforce the behavior and cause a child to repeat it.