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Parenting and Caregiving Styles

Family
Caregiving Approaches Self-Care and Wellness

Discover Your Caregiving Style

One of the interesting things about being a parent is that there is great variation in how each of us raise our children and our parenting styles. At the same time, there are many commonalities from one parent to another. We have resources to help you navigate your own parenting journey, better understand what is best for your children, and connect with your parenting tribe. Covered in this guide:

  • The four parenting styles
  • Central Indiana parenting support groups
  • Teaching young children about consent
  • Diversity, inclusion, and advocacy
  • Parenting more than one child
Dad smiling with preschooler on his shoulders
Getting to know

The Four Parenting Styles

The relationship a child has with their parent(s) can greatly effect a child’s social-emotional development. Dr. John Gottman, a research-psychologist studying parent-child interactions, has identified four types of parents and the effects of these parenting styles on their children. Learn more by visiting the Gottman Institute and by exploring our parenting resources below.

The Gottman Institute

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Exploring the Four Types of Parenting

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Growing in Purposeful Parenting

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Mindfulness Modeling for Parents & Caregivers

Featured Resource

Managing differences in parenting styles

A parenting style has two main components. One is the degree of control a parent attempts to exert over the child. The other is the amount of warmth and affection a parent shows. Researchers often divide parenting style into four categories. View this resource to learn more!
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Parenting Together

Indianapolis-area support groups for parents

Whether you are looking for a group of like-minded parents to connect with, a play group for your children, and/or a specialized support group, we have compiled a list of local parenting groups near you.

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Indy's Child

Parenting Groups

From theCityMoms to Indy Dad's Group, Indy's Child has compiled a list of the top parenting play groups in the Indy area.
Indy's Child
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Indy with Kids

Local Meetups and Playgroups

Check out Indy with Kids' list of free and at-cost parenting playgroups and meetups in a wide range of categories.
Indy With Kids
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AdoptUSKids

Indiana Post-Adoption Support

AdoptUSKids has compiled a list of support groups for adoptive, kinship, and foster families around the state.
AdoptUSKids
Mom and daughter high fiving
Touch Topics

Teaching Young Children about Consent

Teaching a kid about consent has nothing to do with teaching them about sex. It’s about respecting boundaries. When parents establish firm boundaries and limits, even around things like access to snacks or television time, they are teaching children about consent.

Education about consent should start early! When we start the conversation about consent at a young age, kids are able to develop a strong foundation to build healthy boundaries and relationships throughout their lifetime.

Watch more on YouTube

Teach children to ask permission

Teach children to ask permission before touching or hugging a playmate. Use language like, “Mary, let’s ask John if he would like to hug bye-bye.” If John says “no”, help your children respect boundaries and tell her, “John said no. He does not want a hug. That’s okay! Let’s wave bye-bye to him instead.”

Teach your children that “no” and “stop” are important words and should be respected. Like the scenario above, it was important to respect John’s “no” and help Mary understand that. During play, help children check-in with their playmates when they hear these words and explain that when we  hear “no” we always stop what we’re doing immediately. No matter what.

Parents also need to respect their children’s boundaries, too! Model consent by not tickling, hugging, kissing, or wrestling children when they say no.

Let children make choices

Give children the opportunity to say yes or no in everyday choices. Let them choose their clothing or have a say in what they wear, what they play, or the color of their cup at lunchtime. Children lack a lot of control over their lives, so allowing them to make choices supports their desire for independence, reduces power struggles, and shows them that their voice and opinions matter.

Obviously, there are times when they don’t have a choice (like riding in their car seat or taking a nap!), but help them understand that you heard their request and that it mattered to you, but that you want to keep them safe and healthy. Say things like “I hear you. You aren’t ready to nap. Your body needs to rest. Let’s race upstairs and read together before you go to sleep!”

Teach children to listen to their "belly voice"

Talk about “gut feelings” or instincts. Sometimes things make us feel weird, or scared, or yucky and we don’t know why. Ask your child if that has ever happened with them and listen quietly as they explain. For younger children, the concept of intuition is very abstract, but they can understand that they have a “belly voice” and this voice talks to them when things do not seem right.

Teach them that this “belly voice” is sometimes correct, and that if they ever have a gut feeling that is confusing, they can always come to you for help in sorting through their feelings and making decisions.

Hug, kiss, or high-five!

Never force a child to hug, touch or kiss anybody, for any reason, even grandparents! If Grandma is demanding a kiss and your child is resistant, offer alternatives by saying something like, “Would you rather give Grandma a high-five or blow her a kiss, maybe?”

You can always explain to Grandma, later, what you’re doing and why. But don’t make a big deal out of it in front of your kid. Create good-bye routines or rituals that give choices and establish that as the normal. When it’s time to go, say something like “We are leaving now and it is time to say goodbye. Would you like to give Grandpa a hug, kiss, or high-five?” Respect their choice, if is their answer is “no.”

Allow children to talk about their body in any way they want, without shame

Allow children to talk about their body in any way they want, without shame. Teach them the correct words for their genitals, and make yourself a safe place for talking about bodies and sex.

Teach kids that the way their bodies are changing is great, but can sometimes be confusing. The way you talk about these changes — whether it’s loose teeth or pimples and pubic hair — will show your willingness to talk about other sensitive subjects.

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Diversity, Inclusion, and Advocacy

Conversations about differences will look different for each family. While there is no one-size-fits-all approach, the science is clear: the earlier parents start the conversation with their children the better.

You are the example your child follows

You are your child’s introduction into the world. What they see you do is just as important as what they hear you say. Like language, understanding and respecting differences is modeled through conversations with parents and caregivers. Take every opportunity to teach them that every person deserves to be treated with dignity and respect, starting with themselves.

diversity ally
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Growing Allyship, Advocates, and Disrupters

challenging behaviors
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Advocating for my Child at Child Care

supporting diversity at home
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Supporting and Valuing Diversity

servicios financiera
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Servicios para las familias

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La Violencia Domestica 101

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Su Guía a los Hitos del Desarrollo

Featured Resource

30 days of PRIDE

Celebrate the LGBTQ+ community through these hands-on activities, family conversations, books, and local events!
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Parenting more than one child

Once you have a second child, your parenting style often changes drastically. Not only have you been-there-done-that, but you are also learning to navigate the dynamics of your children’s interactions with each other. Watch one of our recent webinar recordings to learn more!
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Sibling Play: Activities for the Whole Family

sibling rivalry
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Sibling Rivalry

Related News & Stories

Read more from our team of experts.

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dad and child
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February 13, 2022
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